I look into the mirror and I recognize the face,

but I'm not sure I know the man.

I know what he is capable of if left to his own choices.

As the song so aptly puts it

"when I had the choice between good and bad, I picked bad

two out of three"

If I look close enough, I see changes.
I notice that there is a more serious tone to this man.

He still laughs and is tender hearted but there is a resolve

within him that causes him to push on toward "The prize"

as the Apostle Paul wrote about.
Oh, this man would never compare himself to the Apostle Paul,

but he understands that everything here on earth, in this natural

world is fleeting and fading.

That the only real truth is the truth found in God's word.

This man holds no degrees from universities.
It's not that he disdains such, it is simply that he has not been

released to pursue such venues.

He has one thing and one thing only.
A call.

It started in 1963.

He heard it fully in 1964.

He ran from the call in 1965.

He looked within himself and could not find anything

that would let him know fulfilling this call would be possible.

Trouble was, he looked within himself.

He should have looked up.

Looked up to where the call came from.

He ran for 31 years.

Oh during this time, God was faithful and kept this man

from destroying himself, but the man never really fulfilled

anything during this time toward the call he had heard.
He simply held jobs and paid his bills.

Loved his wife and help raise two sons.

But all the while, this man knew that he had rejected the call.

He felt as though he had disqualified himself because of his running away.

He could not read or hear anything about the book of JONAH and not

feel pain and guilt, shame and sorrow for what he had done.

Change started to take place in 1994, May 26th of that year.
God spoke...

Not audible but within.
A conversation took place between the man and his God.

The man asked questions and God responded with "Go and do!"

The man obeyed, still not believing that this would lead to answering

the call from so long ago.

In 1997 an offer was made because of the things this man had done.

"Have you considered being ordained into the ministry?"

The man replied with a resounding "No". But in his heart

he knew that this was God, once again in love and mercy

extending the call.

The man said, "Yes, I'll do it."

July 6, 1997 the call was accepted.

The man stepped fully into faith on August 1, 1998.

That step took him to places and people he never dreamed of meeting in his wildest dreams.

It put him squarely into a world of hurting people.
the man, with no answers, said, "I'll be your voice."
And God responded.

So here today, January 26, 2010

This man daily goes about the very thing he swore he could not do back in 1964.

The man knows it does not come from himself, but from God.

This man has learned to rely on God for everything.
What falls under everything?
everything!

It would be nice if this story was all neat and wrapped in a pretty package with

a huge bow on it to make it appealing,

but the truth is

following has been hard.

There were times the man wanted to quit

but didn't.

Just when he was at the point of quitting, God would show up

and reveal something or show the man something,

or someone would stop by and share an encouraging word that

renewed the passion within this man.
he would once again rise and start the journey God had called him to.

Today this man, me, is very grateful for everyone who believed in him,

even when he didn't believe in himself.

I do not hold any false notions about my own self worth in what has transpired

over the past 13 years.

I know that God has been at every turn.
He deserves the glory and honor.

I'm just grateful that he let me be a part.

God on you...

mb