Isaiah 13:2
Behold, God, my salvation! I will trust and not be afraid. For the Lord God is my strength and song. Yes, He has become my salvation.
I tend to bask in the glow of what transpires on Saturday night, all day Sunday. Thinking back on the good and the not so good that happened in our meeting. Did I say what needed to be said? Did I muddy the waters with the teaching, or was it easily understood. Did the worship songs connect and provide a place where everyone could enter into worship. Did the Holy Spirit minister during the evening? Did I make myself accessible to everyone who needed to talk or share about something in their life? And the list goes on and on. I think it is the mercy of God that brings these things to mind, allowing a critique of sorts to be formulated. Bottom line in all of this, I want to grow as an individual and be about the kingdom business in my every day life. I don't want to drag out my "religiosity" every Saturday evening, put it on, and to to Vineyard ReCovery, only to go home and hang it back up in the closet until next Saturday. I want to walk in relationship with Christ, every moment of every day. Impossible you say.....I don't think so. All of these questions put me in a mind of remembering yesterday and this morning. "How did we get to where we are today? Has it really been 20 years?" So, I had to pull some of my journals and reread the entries that lead us to the present meeting we call Vineyard ReCovery.
August 3, 1999
There was a release today. A release for me to begin a Saturday night worship service. As far as I can tell, it will initially be aimed at the men who are in the program at Rapha, and their families. As I sat having my quiet time this morning, I was lead to the book of Nehemiah, how his heart was stirred by God for the rebuilding of the walls of Jerusalem. My heart is stirred for the rebuilding of lives and of those who have been trapped in addiction. For them to have a place where they can come and receive prayer, ministry, and be experience the truth about the gospel (good news). What good news? That they do not have to live in a broken relationship with Christ anymore. They can truly be made whole and set free.
I'm yours Lord. I place myself in Your hands for this new work. I am very much aware of Your presence as I sit here and enter this into my journal. Give me the vision and the strength to see this Saturday meeting brought forth and established. I ask that you would send people to join in this work. People to love those who come....people who will serve in Your name. Burn us all.....set us on fire with a desire to move beyond what our minds are expecting. Let us move into the area where our expectations come from Your heart. I ask that You would keep this new work hidden from the enemy until the time of Your revealing. Your name to be praised. Great are Your works, Lord.
(The first meeting took place on August 21, 1999)
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What was funny, strange, bizarre, or what ever adjective you want to us to describe it. At the first of the August 3 entry, I stated that there was a release for me to do Saturday night meeting, what took place in the whole "release" thing was pretty neat. I was at the church and was talking with Jim Bentley and Wayne Finely in the bookstore. I was sharing what all God was telling me concerning the Saturday meeting, when Wayne suggested that they pray over me, to release me to see where this meeting was going. He and Jim laid hands on me and began to pray. After a few moments, the presence of God came in power...and we all were thrown in different directions. As best I can remember, Jim was knocked to the floor, Wayne was thrown backwards into the bookshelves, and I was bent over, as though a great weight was upon my shoulders. I remember a lot of crying and gratitude and, at the same time ,the thought of "Oh God! Where is this going to go? What if I mess it up? What if I really hadn't heard you about starting this meeting." I have now come to realize that such are the thoughts and things we all wrestle with when we feel like God is calling us to move in a new area that we've never been before. We started a Saturday night called "House of Blue"....from that meeting, we started a Wednesday night meeting we called "Vineyard After Dark". We transitioned Sunday morning over to a "Doing The Stuff:101" class where we taught how to minister to others.
It truly has been a long, strange trip.
But I'm glad I went along for the ride.
until tomorrow.
God on you.....
mb
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